My Padang-Bukit Tinggi trip

I went there in May. Just sharing my photos

More

HERE

Congratulations Lee Kok Sun!

Kok Sun has graduated and is waiting for his induction course. I should actually call him Dr Lee !
I think the first time I met him was as a little boy. His mum or dad would bring him to see me when he was sick.

Today he came to see me because he was sick ! This time , instead of just examining and writing a prescription, respecting him for his knowledge as a doctor , I asked him what his concern was and told him what I was prescribing and asked his opinion what he wanted.

No doubt I was a doctor long before he was born , then again he probably knows much more than me about anatomy and the latest drugs even though I try my best to keep abreast of the latest in medical advances.

In medicine , what one learns 5 years ago is out of date and management changes .
Even drugs that were first choice are now looked upon in disdain.
Take for example atenolol , a beta blocker drug indicated for hypertension. I never liked it very much because it gave most people a slow heart and can cause spasm in the lungs and worse still, for me it could cause impotence. So I reserved it for old women who had a lot of anxiety because of the calming effect of this drug and no history of asthma.Through meta studies over very long periods of time , it is now known to precipitate diabetes mellitus in susceptible people!

Another drug that does the same ( precipitate diabetes)are diuretics that were once used a lot especially when there was a slight degree of heart failure.

As for diabtes, Dibenclamide used to be first line and glucophage was abandoned . Then now we have a reversal and use glucophage rather than dibenclamide. Why? Because dibenclamide does not protect the remaning islet of Langerhans, insulin producing cells and can make a non insulin dependent diabetic into an insulin dependent diabetic over the years. So what else can be prescribed if the patient needs more than one drug? Januvia is the latest and I think safest ..but it hurts the pocket !

You could always opt for homeopathy though!

So now with the babies I used to treat becoming doctors , I guess I need to be on my toes so as not to show how out of date my medical knowledge is...

Gone are the days when an older person can say " I have eaten more salt than you therefore I know better than you what to do !"

So my prayers for Dr Lee.....

May you be the best Dr that you can be and may you always have the enthusiasm and good attitude towards your patients.

Really they are not called patients for nothing ....you need to have a lot of patience!

Preventing Entropy of Mind and Heart

Kenyir lake

This is nothing to do with Kenyir but is a cultural show in Bukit Tinggi ( Sumatra).I was there two weeks ago

This is me in front of the cabin in Kenyir Resort about a couple of months ago. Observe the mp4 hanging around my neck. This was an entropy preventing trip of seeking beauty in nature and reflecting on my spiritual teachers words ( the mp4)

This is the cabin from outside

What has triggered this topic is a combination of human actions and reactions and my current project: A book on EQ.

This book has been good for me in more ways than one.

• It has induced me into becoming aware of my emotions and how I interact with people
• It has made me even more convinced to always try new things
• It has made me more persistent in my efforts to balance my emotions , experience peace and joy in the depth of my being
• Last but not least, remove from the environment the polluting effects of my own toxic emotions by not feeling them .

What has all this got to do with entropy?

On a discussion recently on the sufi studies list , while discussing about human behaviour Mushtaq mentioned the word entropy in the way things happen . Even when things start out as lofty ideals and best intentions , it kind of deteriorates over the years and naturally depraved human beings give in to their egos and lusts and desires.

This is getting complicated so I will just stop here with a few observations and suggestions

When was the last time you REACTED rather than RESPONDED?
What I mean by this is you jumped to conclusions, made judgment on a person who is communicating with you and became absolutely angry and out of control and then started to exchange insults?

If you tell me you did that in the past one week then my next question is ...

What have you been doing recently to stop brain and heart rot? I am not talking about some rare disease caused by germs or viruses but the all too human tendency not to do things that develop the brain and the heart.

What are these activities you want to know?

Here are some suggestions

• Pray with full focus and and concentration
• Contemplate on beauty - nature , poems , music etc..( What is that? These things don't move you ...aiyooo.....come see me to unsupress , I will give you a homeopathic remedy )
  
• Learn a new skill
• Read a book that is not essentially junky
  
• Memorise a verse or saying or ayat that is soul food
• Do something you have not done before
• Reflect on your deeds without being defensive
• Stop finding excuses for your shitty behavior
  
• Hug a kitten or a tree if you do not have a kitten
• play with young children ( tolerating them while feeling rotten does not count)
  
• Did something positive for someone out of the sheer goodness of your heart ( force yourself to do this if you cannot find the goodness -hopefully it will have to surface -unless the rot is total! )
  

How will you know you have stopped the brain and heart rot ?
When you cannot remember when the last time you yelled in anger because of your intolerance and judgmental attitude and your heart does not easily contract in anger and tension and your mind is not constantly thinking of ways to entertain your jaded senses.

Susan Boyle - Singer - Britains Got Talent 2009 (With Lyrics)

For some reason this will not play . Just go to this URL to hear the Youtube

I cried the first time I heard her sing and then when I listed to it again , I cried again.
She has a most beautiful heart wrenching voice. And watch Simon's face as he hears her sing - what does it express?

Su

I dreamed a dream


I dreamed a dream in time gone by
When hope was high,
And life worth living
I dreamed that love would never die
I dreamed that God would be forgiving.

Then I was young and unafraid
When dreams were made and used,
And wasted
There was no ransom to be paid
No song unsung,
No wine untasted.

But the tigers come at night
With their voices soft as thunder
As they tear your hopes apart
As they turn your dreams to shame.

And still I dream he'll come to me
And we will live our lives together
But there are dreams that cannot be
And there are storms
We cannot weather...

I had a dream my life would be
So different from this hell I'm living
So different now from what it seems
Now life has killed
The dream I dreamed.

The girl who silenced the world for 5 minutes

This is a speech worth listening to. She is talking about the environment .

Peace Train by Yusuf Islam (Cat Stevens)

Singer Yusuf Islam, formerly known as Cat Stevens, performs a sound check ahead of his concert at El Rey theatre in Los Angeles May 11, 2009.

In a black mood

For reasons best kept to myself , I am in a black mood

PAINT IT BLACK
The Rolling Stones

I see a red door and I want it painted black
No colors anymore I want them to turn black
I see the girls walk by dressed in their summer clothes
I have to turn my head until my darkness goes
I see a line of cars and theyre all painted black
With flowers and my love both never to come back
I see people turn their heads and quickly look away
Like a new born baby it just happens evry day
I look inside myself and see my heart is black
I see my red door and it has been painted black
Maybe then Ill fade away and not have to face the facts
Its not easy facin up when your whole world is black

No more will my green sea go turn a deeper blue
I could not foresee this thing happening to you
If I look hard enough into the settin sun
My love will laugh with me before the mornin comes

I see a red door and I want it painted black
No colors anymore I want them to turn black
I see the girls walk by dressed in their summer clothes
I have to turn my head until my darkness goes
Hmm, hmm, hmm,…
I wanna see it painted, painted black
Black as night, black as coal
I wanna see the sun blotted out from the sky
I wanna see it painted, painted, painted, painted black
Yeah!

Joel Osteen teaches Christians about PORK!

Hmmm......

For those of you who still eat pork .....more reason not to!

Forgot your Name (Surrogate Sharers Ep.4)

hahhaha This sometimes happens to me !

Ahem ....

Playing For Change: Song Around the World "Stand By Me"

Dedicated to those who I will stand by and who will stand by me!

Just when you thought it was safe to get back into the water!

I know the title is a corny line from an advert about a sequel to the horror shark movie Jaws that was perhaps the beginning of several horror movies like Anaconda and the likes of it .

What is it about being eaten alive or having parts of a person bitten off that is so fascinating that such movies become box office hits?

The line popped out at me after I began to see myself spiralling again to an emotional and mental state that I thought I had left behind so very many years ago .

Just when we taught we are so old that we have outgrown certain needs of the past , the needs come back stronger than ever .

Just when we thought we had become wise because of the additional years to our lives , we realise that it is just not so .

But I suppose in the very realisation lies the increase in awareness and perhaps being down in the dumps from knowing that I am a weak and faulty human ,I surrender myself and I then hold out my arms in helplessness and allow God to pull me up again....

SHADOW AND LIGHT

How does

a part of the world

leave the world?

How does wetness

leave water?

Dont' try to put out fire

by throwing on more fire!

Don't wash a wound

with blood.

No matter how fast you run,

your shadow keeps up.

Sometimes it's in front!

Only full overhead sun

diminishes your shadow

But that shadow

has been serving you.

What hurts you,

blesses you.

Darkness

is your candle.

Your boundaries

are your quest.

I could explain this,

but it will break

the glass cover

on your heart,

and there's no fixing that.

You must have

shadow and light source

both.

Listen,

and lay your head

under the tree of awe.

When from that tree

feathers and wings

sprout on you,

be quieter than a dove.

Don't even open your mouth

for even a coo.

Jelal'uddin Rumi - 13th century Sufi mystic and poet

From The Soul of Rumi. Translated by Coleman Barks.

THE SERVANTS PRAYER

The last week

Dr ( H ) Zamil chairing , Suriya and A. Prof Dr Asmadi ( my future boss)

My homeopath friends and Dr Asmadi listening intently to what I was saying

I have not been blogging lately thanks to a a bug I caught . This particular virus is called the lazy bug ! I have managed to fill my mind with a load of stuff that are perhaps not worth the time of day. I used the word perhaps and this is because I am not really sure if it is not worth anything.
Everything one does , all that one focuses on and all that one thinks about will definitely have an impact on oneself . More so for me, being an empath I not only see people , I absorb their emotions and states.

I am addicted to some people and some dramas on tv . I actually know why. They give me a good feeling in my heart . I avoid those that do not give me a good feeling but I do not mind feeling sad and love lorn ! Indeed , what I found out after overdosing myself on K drama is that I allowed myself to get emotionally moved and it helped me crack open a door that I think had been almost shut for a some time. This door is the door of my emotions. I had been feeling rather flat and dull , with not much amplitude in my emotions and I know it is a state I get into from time to time when I do not travel , do not move myself from my daily routine , and do not do or attend any workshops or seminars. I told my beloved spouse I must have shut down my passion.

Which is why when my friend called to tell me a classmate was found dead, I burst into tears . Tears of grief , of shock , of regret and a hundred and one emotions . Tini , I think everybody in class either envied or admired you or both ! Myself included! You lived a full and vibrant life , and I think that you died in the prime of your life , while people around you loved and needed you. You will be sorely missed by your family and friends and patients.

Dr Haliza Shafie was my classmate.Tini is her nickname . She was also the best student in my batch . This Batu Gajah Perak girl became a paediatrician and I heard she was an ardent hiker and she died while checking out a hiking site in the jungle at Melawati .

Tini my dear friend, Allah bless you and accept your soul . Your death has made me more aware of how precious my time is for I do not know when YOU will call me back . I know when the time comes I cannot argue with YOU to say I am not ready or that I still have things to do .

What is going to count when I am gone? Is it how much money I made? How much fame I aqquired ? Or , is it about how many lives I manage to touch and enrich ? How much love I give and receive ? How much I put into this life that makes a difference to people , that builds them up , emotionally spiritually , intellectually and physically.

It brings me to realise my needs . At the last MAP meeting ( Malaysian Association of Psychotherapy) a speaker was talking about psychometry tests and when he came to the part of the test about Needs . I almost jumped. Here I write a few needs. They may not be my needs or maybe all of them are human needs to some degree .

Need to control
Need to be right
Need to please people
Need to be popular
Need to be liked
Need to be in the limelight
Need to connect to people deeply
Need to communicate

The list is endless! And what lies beyond these needs are the reasons we have these needs and I think it is worth digging our hearts to find this reason behind these needs.
For me, one of the biggest needs I have that seems to be so difficult to have is the need to connect to people deeply and to communicate. I used to be able to share my thoughts very openly and as time went by , I realise more and more how much I needed to filter out certain things from certain people and under certain circumstances and the more civilised one gets , the less one is able to bare the soul !

Before this meeting , there was this seminar that I was involved in. It was organised by the Malaysian Council of Homeopathy and I was speaking about my new baby ...still gestating . My Bachelor of Science in Homeopathic Medicine at Cyberjaya University College of Medical Sciences. I should be having a great deal of anxiety over this since not only is working in a university a new experience for me , but I am going to be among skeptics and those who would probably be pushing me to my limits . I am going to be sailing in uncharted waters and perhaps making new maps . Yet the anxiety refuses to come. Instead there is this exhilaration and anticipation . Perhaps I have been waiting all my life for this . And I am thinking what need is this fulfilling ? Perhaps I have been waiting for my mind to be stretched , for an intellectual discourse and a social interaction with people whom I have chemistry with ( they are the ones I am addicted to ..it makes me happy to interact with them ) . Perhaps I have been waiting to synergise with people I like . Perhaps I have always been the adventurer who gets resltess staying in one place, needing the stimulation of different groups of people under different circumstances .

And , if I seem to have become younger than my age , perhaps it is because I am that in this new field .

To my future bosses, please tolerate my ignorance and teach me ! Some of you are younger than me but I am younger than you in experience in this field . To my future students, here is to a warm and loving relationship full of fun and learning. To my future colleagues , let us give it our all, put our hearts and minds to what we want to do and make this happen!

Flaming Star

Every now and then you meet people you would like to get to know better.

I met a couple of them this weekend

Faikis is one of them for me . This is a video of him playing the guitar and singing which he seems to do pretty well !

I will be working with the other some time this year .

Really looking forwards to a new role

Stand By Me - Shayne Ward - Lyrics

Starship - It's Not Over (Til It's Over)

The words of this song are what we will be singing until we get it right !

Pray that the casualty rate will not be too high!

Lyrics

It's Not Over 'til It's Over

Hey
Listen:
We don't call the shots here
We don't make the rules
We take what we get
Get what we can.

And it's learning the hard way, here on the streets
You can't build a dream, without a plan.

Passion speaks
Let them hear you speak, for me
They play to win
We play for keeps.

It's not over 'til it's over
It's not over 'til we get it right.

The odds are against us
Say we don't stand a chance
When there's no giving up
No giving in.

When push comes to shove, you got to fight for what you love
You do what you must
Do what you can.

Passion, speaks
Let them hear you speak, for me
They play to win
We play for keeps.

It's not over 'til it's over
It's not over 'til we get it right. Get it right!

The odds are against us
You know we still stand a chance

There's no giving up
No giving in
It's not over!

It's not over 'til it's over
It's not over 'til we
'til we
'til we
'til we
'til we get it right!

It's not over 'til it's over
It's not over 'til we
'til we
'til we
'til we
'til we get it right!

The Spiritually Inclined Person

This quote below is from Eric Pepin's book the Navigator. Muslims who believe Non Muslims do not know the real truth have a huge problem dealing with information that is not from Muslim sources. It becomes a handicap and a blindspot as they reject information that do at times give an indication of what is a true description and accurate account of what really IS. The fact is, as Human beings all of us , Muslim and non Muslim, as long as we are sincere searchers for the truth will have access to realisations such as the one Eric Pepin has written here .

We are lost in an ocean of humankind; a world that we are part of but separate from. Through our entire lives we have questioned reality; social structures, religions and relationships… suspecting that there is much more that awaits us.

We desperately feel an urge to return to whence we came but have lost the map that guides us. We hold a constant desire to reawaken a sleeping memory that, if brought to life, will change the face of this world for the good of humanity.

If what you want more than anything else is completion, you are looking for the map that will reunite you with that which you seek. It cannot be an ordinary map. It must be a guide that transcends time and space… and it must have the power to take you to that which has eluded you.

Join me in Retreat

Are you surrounded by wealth and possessions and still feeling something is not quite right or , that there is something you want but still do not have?
Are you easily bored by your possessions and keep discarding them for new ones?
Do you feel stressed out by the people and atmosphere around you?
Do you need to find out who you really are?
Have you ever wondered what your spiritual body is made of?
Do you wonder what you are doing here in this world?
Do you feel distanced from God?
Do you feel a longing to find the answers?

If you do then join me in a healing and self discovery retreat at Lembah Beringin, far away from the crowd and your daily life.
Retreat from the worldly affairs to change your perspective and renew your senses and get insight to make your life become more purposeful and meaningful.

Click on Calender for details. Log in to your google account to view my calender or make an account if you do not have one.

Preparing for the inevitable

I was called upon to help a sick friend recently.
I hope and pray he was helped by my presence and my suggestions. I also hope when it is my turn to ask for help, someone will come as I went and that someone would perceive what it was I needed at that point in time and give it to me .

This was what I wrote for him, at his request. He was very sick and , his illness made it difficult for him to focus. On my second and last visit , which was also the last time that I was to see him alive, he indicated that he had read and understood and I believe carried out the suggestions I gave him.

Ya Rabbi , accept his soul , his good deeds and forgive his shortcomings!

This below is what I wrote for him


Things we need to resolve :

1. Issues of guilt : Understand the circle of influence is less than the circle of concern.
a. Do what we can do to resolve the issue : ask for forgiveness, right whatever wrongs etc
b. Leave what we cannot do to Allah REDHA because Allah will never burden a soul more than the soul is capable of .

2. Inheritence : make wills etc, settle things

3. Debts: insya allah ask for help . let go of EGO because EGO wants to pull us towards material life which we will have to let go anyway .

Attitudes we need to change

1. Regard this time of illness as a time of retreat from world and worldly matters by resolving our issues as above
2. Focus on our origin: Our origin is Allah " Innalillah " and know that we will return to Allah " Wa Inna Illaihi Raj'un"
3. Know that we actually long for Allah and shift from the mental body to the emotional body and find that longing for Allah that lives in the heart .This longing is the source of peace and joy eternal and is the balm that makes all suffering bearable.
4. Understand that our illness is ordained and is Allah's will and surrender to Allah's will and trust Allah completely . We may not understand Allah's perspective but even without this understanding , we need to trust Allah completely.
5. Understand that anxiety and worry over worldly matters is what Shaitan wants from us and if we succumb to the wiles of Shaitan then we have let Shaitan win.

Let us read the Quran !

This from Marina Mahathir's blog. The message is self explanatory!
........................................................................................................................................................

Peace!

We need your participation!

Campaign name: Let’s Read The Quran


On January 1st 2009, four friends Syed, Walski, Marina and Anas got together at Coffee-Bean Bangsar Village and decided to launch a campaign to encourage people to read and understand the Quran better.

This campaign is not only for Muslims, but also for our brothers and sisters who are Christians, Buddhists Hindus, Sikhs and those who believe in a God-Head but not so gung-ho about being in any brand of religion, too – come join us and share your ideas! You can join this campaign even if you are an atheist!

The goal of this campaign is to encourage people to read the Quran in the language they understand most and find in it areas of common values in our day-to-day living.

What is the Campaign all about?

Read the Quran in the language that you are familiar with.

When will the campaign start and end?

January 15th to February 14th (Happy Valentine’s Day!)

Where?

Participating blogs in the blogosphere.

Why?

So more people know what the Quran says and what the Quran does not say and to match it to what is really said in our daily lives.

Who?

Everyone who wants to – the more the merrier! If you have a Blog, Facebook, etc carry the logo/icon.

How?

- To join the campaign, place the accompanying logo/icon at your blog.
- Write or share short articles based on the Quranic text.
- Share what you find in the Quran with family and friends.
- Ask questions about the Quranic message
- Read the Quran – eg click here http://www.islamicity.com/QuranSearch or www.altafsir.com

Peace and Thanks,

Marina Mahathir, Rantings by MM, http://www.rantingsbymm.blogspot.com
Syed Akbar Ali, OutSyed the Box, http://www.syedsoutsidethebox.blogspot.com
Walski, myAsylum, http://www.asylum60.blogspot.com
and,
Anas Zubedy , http://www.letusaddvalue.blogspot.com

Participating Blogs

1. 3540 Jalan Sudin http://www.nursamad.blogspot.com/
2. ARTiculations: http://art-harun.blogspot.com/
3. Being Human in the World: http://www.peru.name/writing
4. Cowboy Malaysia: http://cowboymalaysia.wordpress.com
5. Disquiet: http://malikimtiaz.blogspot.com
6. Jebat Must Die: http://jebatmustdie.wordpress.com/
7. Lunch at the Lake Club: http://lunchatthelakeclub.blogspot.com
8. MACVAYSIA: http://macvaysia.com
9. O.B.E. http://shar101.wordpress.com/
10. Poetic Justice: http://nizambashir.com/
11. Rapera: http://jahaberdeen.blogspot.com/
12. Renovatio: http://stephendoss.blogspot.com
13. Rocky's Bru: http://rockybru.com.my/
14. Write Away: http://elviza.wordpress.com/
15. Writing By Amir: http://amirmu.blogspot.com/