Tuesday, October 25, 2005

Past Present and Future

Some time ago , I wrote about being a healing presence and the difference between a wounding presence and a healing presence.
Today I 'd like to touch on another kind of presence, presence of mind.
To be living in the present.
Does this mean not to study history or muse about our past deeds, no, but the past has gone,what's done is done We 're to learn from the past and we' re to use the lessons of the past in the present. As for the future, it is the present and what we do in the present that shapes the
future.

I was treating a lady who has a regular job as a clerk in a large company. She has a stable and steady job, she has a lovely family , a good husband and averagely nice children.

Yet , while still in her mid thirties, she had developed hypertension and had a gall bladder stone . She was also overweight, a common problem with people having a desk job that bored them to tears, a home and family that also bored them to tears and they found pleasure in eating!
What seems to me is that they practised the enthusiasm and living in the present, only as related to food! Having said this reminds me of my own battle of the bulge and countless others who 're not in this category , but that is another matter!

Boredome with routine, boredom with a job that is done with drudgery only to earn a living which then carries and spills over when she reaches home, more work, housework , the kids cooking cleaning...and a repetition the next morning!

I had a question for her...does she pay attention to what she is doing or, does she live in the past, does she live in some niggling worry that occupies her mind, does she live in the If only land..if only I had a bigger house , I d be happy, if only I could have a handbag like that lady's..or for a man, if only I could have that gorgeous woman as my second wife.......(but it is not possible because I can barely afford my own family although they bore me).

I had one piece of suggestion for her...Live in the now and here. Pay attention to what you re doing, try to do it well, use your spare time to plan or to engage in something beautiful and creative, if you really do not have the time, then do your work in as good a manner as you can,
get a satisfaction from the work.

I can hear an objection from a houseproud overworked housewife who is clearing and cleaning and clearing and cleaning and finding it exasperating to cope with some energy guzzlers who are also waste producers and mess makers but otherwise almost totally unproductive and
uncontributive at home..they go by the names of hubby and kiddies...I cannot offer any answers here because my houseproud episodes are few and far between ;-)

What I could recommend is for you to be a healing presence to your own hurts, your own anger and frustrations. How to do this. For me it is to be aware of the emotion, not throw it to the background and trudge on being irritable all day.

I practise a self awareness that clues me in to my feelings and the reasons for them. And then, when I can spare five minutes, I spend the quiet moment breathing deeply, slowly and being aware of Allah's love and compassion. I concentrate on my heart centre, allow my feelings full
expression, shed a few tears if I need it...and I watch as my emotions get digested and changed into a spiritual nourishment that sustains and strengthens me till the next episode....for what are these irritations and troubles and hurts but God's training for our spiritual development.

As to being bored, I think being grateful and counting the blessings in one's life, savouring each passing moment and making the most of it will cure this boredom..

3 comments:

dith said...

Insyallah will try to remember this advice each time I feel bored and burnt out :))

Anonymous said...

Sounds practical, reasonable and workable. Just wished that pycnogenol will always remember.....
Thank you. I really appreciate this.

Suriya said...

Dr Roza
We all feel that way sometimes but remember it is just the ripples on the lake while in the depth the lake is peaceful and joyful.
Pycno same thing , we will forget but we will remember again when we learn to quickly connect to that part of us that is peaceful, joyful and wise....