The dilemma

Now this post is about my work , at least one aspect of my work and that is seeing patients.
I think this blog is to help me sort out my attitude towards this .

I have a clinic and it is a walk in one , except I insist that those who come in for healing and complementary therapies make an appointment!

The problem with this system is that sometimes the appointment comes at the end of a very long day and I m just too tired to give my best and the other problem is that patients still come from some far away place and want to see me during my regular walk in patient time which creates a jam in my clinic because the alternative treatment consultations take more time.

I know I need more time for other things as well and sometimes number of cases that are merely routine makes me feel pretty dull. Then in between the routine cases will be one that needs more attention and because I ve become dull, I miss paying attention!

But what do I do? Seeing patients pays my bills and gives me the money to travel and do the other things I want to do.

Also , I like to help people by helping them overcome their illnesses and their blocks and their woes and pains.

But I do not like routine and routine cases. I feel it makes me dull and it also makes me feel mediocre.
What makes me feel worse is when panel patients turn me into a dispenser by telling me what medication they want or , they turn me into a clerk by asking me for a referal to the specialist over some small ailment which I could easily treat. But some of these grouses are because of my ego , I can see that and perhaps a good way to remain humble is to allow them to do this. After all the loss is not mine but their , in that they cannot see what I have to offer.

Now that is another frustration! You cannot go about telling people your ablities and sometimes patients come in expecting you to treat them to the fullest of your ability but because of the limitations of a walk in practise, I am often limited by time constraints!

And of course there are times I feel like I am being under used because I do not use my full ablities in helping patients while I know I am not mediocre, I am forced to be mediocre.

Wait a minute, who and what is forcing me?

How can I change this?

OK these are thoughts to work with and I ll get back to this post with more reflections on these grouses that actually cause me a lot of stress everyday!